"As long as you grab for what makes you feel good or makes you look important, are you really much different than a babe at the breast, content only when everything's going your way?" - 1 Corinthians 3:3 (The Message)
I'm the father of two young boys. Both of them have ways of fighting for control and neither of them ever seems content unless everything is going their way. Both of them are also masters of whining, recently perpetuated by a wicked show named Caillou in which the main character, a 4 year old, whines about literally everything and is never disciplined. I want them to learn contentment when things are less certain. It's going to be difficult to teach them when I struggle with the same thing.
That's been a powerful lesson for me lately - something my children are helping me learn, slowly and surely. The idol of my heart that seems to rise up most often and fight for center stage is an idol of control. I loathe uncertainty and I find myself grasping for bits and pieces of control to hedge my bets. It seems as though I have not grown up much. I still want everything to go my way. And did I mention that I hate uncertainty?
So what do I do about the worry and the inordinate desire for control? I can start by remembering that God loves me in spite of my discontent even more than I love my children in spite of theirs. I don't have plans to make life miserable for my children, but I do want them to grow and learn. I have good reason to suspect that God isn't planning to derail all my hopes and dreams either, but he will do whatever is necessary to put me on my knees.
Also, I need help. My kids can't overcome this alone. Neither can I. I need to confess this idol to people that care about me and enlist their help. When they see me worried or frustrated, I need their reminders that things won't always go my way and the future will not always be clear. And yet, God loves me and that is enough. I have to remind myself that the One who IS in control has a pretty good track record of making awesomeness out of nothing.
