Am I a Christian Mafioso?

I'm reading The Next Evangelicalism by Soong-Chan Rah. So far it is rattling my chains big time. I'm especially being challenged by the section on primary and secondary cultures and how that distinction sheds light on church growth models. Primary cultural systems are more relational, verbal, dependent on others. Secondary cultural systems are more industrial, informational, and object-oriented.

Rah uses the Mafia as an example of an organization that uses primary culture to advance secondary culture in an unhealthy way. It is built on relationships and family connections, but the goal is economic gain and power. Am I guilty as a church leader of promoting the idea of relationships to the end of church growth? If so, does that make me any better than a Christian Mafioso?

There is something here to repent of. Relationships are the end, not the means. Rah goes on to say that the healthy intersection is when primary cultural systems are advanced by secondary systems, not the other way around. I'm finding myself asking another question: do I even know what my culture is apart from secondary systems?

Every Day

"Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God. But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called 'today,' that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin." (Hebrews 3:12-13 ESV)

God is carrying all Christians through the process of sanctification, making us more like Jesus over time. But the writer of Hebrews seems clear to me that our own hearts are fighting in the opposite direction. What is the safeguard that God uses to overcome our natural tendency toward hard hearts? The answer is the Spirit's work through community. We need people exhorting us, or encouraging us away from sin, on a daily basis. This is "speaking the truth in love", and it dispels the notion that sanctification is a "me and God" thing. God built us for relationships, so it makes sense that he would use them to change us. Also, pretty much all of our sin happens in the context of relationships, so it makes sense that we change in that same context.

I sometimes tire of the daily need to repent of something I did to my wife. I recently told her, "If only I could go one day without having to deal with something I did or said wrong!" I think this way because I don't take my sin seriously enough. The minute I take a break from the battle is a minute I've lost to dark side. Ignoring sin is a step toward hardheartedness.

The same thing is true when it comes to saying hard things to people you love. We are told do it "today" and not to wait. The longer we wait, the less loving we are. Words spoken in love are like standing with a fellow soldier on a battlefield. Words never spoken are like walking away from a wounded brother to save yourself. God help us for our failure to love one another well.

8 Years, Still a Noob

Eight years ago today I married my best friend. I love that our anniversary falls so close to New Year's, because it is the perfect time to remind me to prioritize my marriage. This time of year, like everyone else I begin thinking about goals for the future and that normally begins with work goals. But my anniversary is an important and strategically positioned reminder that my family comes first, especially my wife. I recently watched Mark Driscoll recount the biographies of a host of historical Christian leaders who accomplished amazing things and are remembered for their work. But each of them failed miserably as a husband and father. I pray that I will not "sacrifice my family on the altar of ministry." And if (when) I do, may I be given the grace to repent quickly.